A few days ago a very highly prized object arrived in the mail.  It was in a basic white nondescript tube, but when I saw the return address I actually said out loud "holy crap. you are real."  Then proceeded to put it in the highest place possible so that no baby would chew it and no toddler would spill milk or hide it.  It was John's diploma from Johns Hopkins University.

Let me preface this diatribe by saying I am completely and totally proud of my extraordinarily geeky husband for earning his MS in Systems Engineering from Hopkins (while working a very busy day job).  I am even more stoked that he figured out a way for the Navy to pay for it.  He rocks my socks and this post is not meant to downgrade his accomplishment. 

But this dang degree nearly drove me into a wine induced coma of frustration.  I decided that JohnS HopkinS was named such because it should take TWO of John to finish their stinking engineering degree program.  It caused more than one fight.  And right before John left for his deployment my feelings went quickly from anger to sadness about the amount of time it was stealing from our family.

Dramatic? Maybe  Absolutely.  But you would be pretty ticked too if your husband was given two weeks of leave before a 7 month deployment and proceeded to spend each day (including the weekends) of that leave at the library from 8AM to 6PM working on a final project for a Master's degree.  While you were home with two babies under the age of two and going through the "pre deployment blues".  And reading Facebook statuses about Bed and Breakfast weekends and Disney Cruises.  Yea.  Not a happy wife.

I know I was not being totally fair.  I started my Master's at 23 years old before we had kids or even a dog.  My first year was done while he was on his first deployment so I didn't even have to worry about spending enough time with John.  I went to class, had long coffee dates, studied in the library for hours without any guilt. He was at sea and babies weren't even a twinkle in our eye.  John supported me (financially and emotionally) the entire 2 years.  I graduated at 25, got a job, and worked for three years before Kate was born.  So for the record, I know that I had it much easier. 

But still.  (you may insert a foot stomp and bratty scowl here)

During an argument during his final semester I was being sassy and told him that I was "going to have a drink with that stupid diploma" when it arrived in the mail.  That it only made sense to stare at it and toast the "stupid" program that was such a huge sanity stealer for two years. 

So without further ado...



Cheers to you, Johnny.  Despite how much this tested my patience, I am truly proud of you.  It was a tough road, but you did it and I know that your investment of time will reap rewards for you and for our family that pale in comparison to two weeks of leave.  Thank you for always working so hard!

* At Test Pilot School my spouse's group had t-shirts made that said "TPS Drove Me to Drink" with a picture of a martini glass.  I am going to submit that Hopkins create a t-shirt of similar snark.  I know that there is a population of women who would buy them.  About 5 are very close girlfriends of mine.