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Monday, July 11, 2011

Moto Moustache?

My husband is perfectly adorable (if I do say so myself).  This is our third deployment and he has always sent me pictures throughout where I go "aww" or "so good to see you"...  until now.  Yes, I am being a drama queen, and yes, this post will be veiled in sarcasm, but I had to discuss the "deployment moustache" with women who might understand.

Here is a picture of my husband from a few short weeks ago:

John on the carrier deck going through the Suez Canal

And here (hide your children) is a picture from last night on Skype:

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!

Seriously, guys?  Are moustaches really motivational?  Does growing a small animal above your lip make you more of a man?  I made a mention of John's molest-ache moustache on Facebook and got many very heated and passionate responses from other military spouses. None positive.  Some were sympathetic and some were emphatic - but none that said "oh wow, it is so sexy when my husband decides to grow a scraggly moustache".

Maybe that is the point?  That at home, if John decided to start growing that thing  he would find me standing over him with a razor in the middle of the night.  So for the time being, I am out of his reach and no amount of ridicule from me (or other guys) will break him down.  He is his own man.  Hear him roar.


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13 comments:

  1. Tiffany PJuly 11, 2011 at 1:05 PM

    I can 100% relate! My husband has a terribly patchy mustache that I have insisted he remove before coming home. Why do they feel like a deployment mustache is a good idea?!?

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  2. Jenni StearnsJuly 11, 2011 at 1:22 PM

    AACCCKKKK! We've been there! Every time Mark went out to sea he'd attempt to grow a mustache. I also call is a molestache because it's just so nasty. I won't kiss him with a mustache and he knows it, although he did show up once with one (and a razor in his pocket) just to see if I'd go through with it. I have no idea what makes them do that when they are deployed...must be the salty air messing with their brain cells (or just the fact that they know they can get away with it!)

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  3. JillJuly 11, 2011 at 1:27 PM

    I hope I don't hear from these people: http://www.americanmustacheinstitute.org/

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  4. S. RussellJuly 11, 2011 at 1:29 PM

    Okay, I'm typically a secret reader here, but this post just cracks me up. I'm sending the link to DH so he can see --ug. He did this right before Christmas one year, and those pictures are all hidden, never to be seen again. Ug.

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  5. AnonymousJuly 11, 2011 at 1:51 PM

    Haha. Creepy as all hell. In a good way of course.

    Clay has never grown a deployment stache because he has never been 'allowed' to due to the nature of his job. I have known him for 10 years and never once have I seen him with facial hair. Is it bad that I secretly want to see what my husband looks like with a mustache? :)

    Karen

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  6. Sarah July 11, 2011 at 2:13 PM

    Plus - aren't they only allowed to have mustache? Goatee or other facial hair isn't allowed in the Navy? I think that's what makes it so Chester the Molester...because it's JUST mustache...which is so 1973...if he had a neatly trimmed goatee or beard to go along with it perhaps it'd look more modern? I dunno, I agree...it's very "come eat candy in the back of my van." My boyfriend had a goatee last year that he shaved off in stages...one of which was Jesse James look. Ick. I'll show it to you on FB.

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  7. S. RussellJuly 11, 2011 at 2:22 PM

    Okay, well, my DH (who is deployed, but not working on the 'stache as far as I know) just responded to me and now I feel bad! He said it's something they have control over and can make a decision about every day, as opposed to "this tan shirt, or that tan shirt?" He also asked how I'd feel about shaving my legs to standard every day, lol! Dang him for being reasonable!

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  8. shlstrJuly 11, 2011 at 2:53 PM

    EEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW! PLEASE !! ACK!

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  9. shlstrJuly 11, 2011 at 2:55 PM

    Kiran just said (insert scared, 5 yr old voice here) "He looks weeeeeeird."

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  10. sanctimomiousJuly 12, 2011 at 2:32 PM

    Eeek! Definitely agree that you should announce you will be joining him by not shaving your legs, and until you get picture verification of a clean face before he returns, he will be having his first night at home wrapped in a sexy embrace with gorgeous blonde who has legs like a lumberjack. Two can play at that game, friend.

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  11. AnonymousJuly 13, 2011 at 3:49 PM

    Dave did that too and he SUCKS at growing facial hair. I do not understand the appeal to it at ALL!

    Couple guys from the squadron were able to get the whole Tom Selleck looking mustache going though, kind of impressive in that "oh my goodness that's so creepy" way.

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  12. Our Traveling CircusJuly 17, 2011 at 4:01 PM

    Yikes! That looks like a giant caterpillar! I am not a fan of the deployment 'stache at all, I know it's a man bonding thing, but my husband looks a lot like Hitler with one. It's disturbing, really.

    I do dislike "Flattop February" much more than the 'stache. I begged S not to partake the month that our son was born, because I knew he'd be in a lot of photos. :)

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  13. Sheri KimesSeptember 23, 2011 at 10:42 AM

    Hey Jill! I'm Lisa Warnick's sister Sheri. My boyfriend is currently deployed and all of the men in his unit grew mustaches as well! How bizarre is it that when you get a group of men together the one bonding exercise they participate in is growing a mustache.

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